In August 2017, Tony Alarcon’s phone rang unexpectedly.
Like many parents, he thought it might be a telemarketer. But this time, he answered the call.
Hearing from the school can be nerve-wracking for any parent. Tony immediately started worrying—was his daughter, Demetra, okay? Had something happened?
What he found out left him surprised.
It was a hot summer day in Northern California, with temperatures reaching 90 degrees. Tony had dropped off his 13-year-old daughter, Demetra, at school that morning. She wore a blue romper to stay cool in the heat, and neither of them thought the outfit would cause any issues.
Demetra, a student at Raymond J. Fisher Middle School in Los Gatos, California, had simply dressed for the weather.
Not everyone agreed with Demetra’s outfit. A teacher at her school said her romper was “too distracting” for the boys.
When the teacher told Demetra that her outfit was too short, her dad, Tony, rushed back to the school with a change of clothes—jean shorts and a tank top. But the school said those clothes were also inappropriate.
Tony was shocked. He asked Demetra to bend over and touch her toes in front of the school administrator. “Nothing is hanging out. There’s nothing inappropriate. I don’t understand this dress code rule,” he told TODAY.
Still, the school said her clothes were “distracting.” Since it was 90 degrees outside, Tony had no choice but to go to his car and grab a pair of leggings for Demetra to wear.
Demetra felt embarrassed.
Tony expressed his frustration, saying, “She’s just a kid. She’s only 13. She’s not trying to be a sex symbol. She just wants to be comfortable and attend class, but we’re not giving her that chance.”
This wasn’t the first time Demetra had been in trouble for her clothes. Just a week before, she was called out for a visible bra strap. “When I got dress coded last week, they said my bra strap was showing,” Demetra told the *San Jose Mercury News*. “Like, I’m wearing a bra—what’s the big deal?”
Tony, a successful investment advisor and father of two, didn’t let it go. Angry at what he saw as an unfair rule that mostly targeted girls, he took his complaint to social media. Parents from all over the country showed their support, agreeing that the school’s dress code was outdated and unfair to girls.
“Demetra’s not the only one. If you sit in the school parking lot, you’ll see that,” Tony said. “Lots of girls just want to be comfortable, but they feel forced to wear leggings even when it’s 100 degrees outside.”
Tony believed that parents, not schools, should decide if their children’s clothes are appropriate. He was also worried about how being told their clothing is a “distraction” to boys could affect young girls emotionally in the long run.
The story quickly got attention from the media, with major news outlets reporting on Tony’s efforts to change the dress code. While the school didn’t speak on camera, they did release a statement:
“The Los Gatos Union School District believes that appropriate dress and grooming contribute to a productive learning environment,” the district said. “Students are expected to wear clothes that reflect the core values of our learning community.”
Tony’s efforts made an impact. His push for change led the Los Gatos Union School District to reevaluate its dress code to make it fairer and less strict for all students.
Lisa Fraser, the school’s principal, explained that the dress code rules, called “Fashion Faux Pas,” apply to both girls and boys. Some of the rules include no hats or hoods indoors, no visible underwear, no inappropriate logos or words, and shorts must have at least 4-inch inseams.
“There has always been a dress code,” Fraser told a newspaper. “These are basic rules for appropriate behavior. I can set guidelines for the school, but I want them to reflect the community’s values.”
In the end, Tony Alarcon’s persistence started an important discussion about how school dress codes affect young girls — showing that one parent’s voice can truly make a difference.
What do you think about the school’s dress code? Have you or your children faced a similar situation? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments!
Their Love Story Started with Hate Letters—See How This Interracial Couple is Winning Today
Actor Leslie Uggams has had an exciting career in both theater and film.
Even with a remarkable career spanning seven decades, the singer and actress from Harlem is best known for her role in the *Deadpool* series.
However, her marriage to White Australian Grahame Pratt in 1965 challenged expectations for interracial relationships, making her life story worthy of a movie.
In 1953, Leslie, a talented singer, recorded a song for MGM when she was just 10 years old. Her aunt, soprano Eloise Uggams, recommended that she attend the famous Julliard School of Music in New York and the Professional Children’s School of New York.
But her career didn’t stop after her musical success; in 1969, she hosted *The Leslie Uggams Show,* the first network variety show hosted by a Black person since *The Nat King Cole Show.*
However, Leslie got to know and fell in love with actor Grahame Pratt behind the scenes. During one of her famous tours in Australia, the pair reconnected in Sydney after first meeting as students at the Professional Children’s School in New York.
Leslie was aware of the challenges of dating a white man because she had dated one in her youth and her aunt had discouraged her from thinking about a future with him. Leslie shared with Ebony in 1967, “I remember the shock I felt once when I was dating a white boy.”
He sent me a color photo of himself. I showed it to my aunt. He was a young, attractive man with nice hair. I thought he was very good-looking. But my aunt lectured me after she saw the picture. “Well, I guess he’s alright,” she said, “but only on dates, huh, honey? When you’re ready to settle down, you’ll marry a nice [Black] fella, won’t you?”
Leslie said that after their lucky meeting, she kept visiting Grahame.
“At just 21 years old, it was surprising that I started to fall in love with him.”
It would be a full year before she saw him again after she left Australia.
Leslie was worried about how her family would react and what would happen if Grahame moved to the U.S. for her job, but despite her worries, they had fallen in love. When they had been engaged for five months, Grahame visited her in New York.
“I wanted to know if my family would truly accept Grahame and not just tolerate him, knowing their views on mixed marriages,” she said.
Leslie didn’t have to worry because Grahame was Australian.
“Many white Americans feel awkward about their situation, but he didn’t.” He got along well with my friends, so he easily fit in with them. And both the men and women liked him.
While living in New York, Leslie said she received hate mail because of their marriage, even though they didn’t face the same racial issues as many others in the country.
In an interview with PEOPLE, Leslie said about her marriage, “It wasn’t as difficult as I expected. I think it’s because Grahame wasn’t a white man in America.” Naturally, they did receive some negative mail.
Leslie shared, “I sometimes get anonymous letters about being married to a white man when I go on tour in the United States. I remember getting one, of all places, in Detroit.” It was addressed to “The Little Negro Entertainer.” Those letters were painful to read and often used that term.
Grahame took on the role of Leslie’s manager, and the couple had two daughters, Danielle in 1970 and Justice in 1976.
Leslie got the lead role in the miniseries Roots in 1977, a year after their second child was born. For that role, she was nominated for an Emmy for her character Kizzy.
Two years later, she played Lillian Rogers Parks in the miniseries Backstairs at the White House, earning another Emmy nomination for Best Actress.
In 1983, she won a Daytime Emmy Award for hosting the NBC game show Fantasy, and in 1996 she played Rose Keefer on All My Children.
Leslie has also made appearances on shows like Family Guy, I Spy, Hollywood Squares, The Muppet Show, The Love Boat, and Magnum P.I.
After fifty-five years of marriage and a granddaughter named Cassidy, Leslie and Grahame are still happily together.
“We have a lot of fun together, but it’s not always sunshine and roses,” Leslie said about their happy marriage. “We enjoy being together.”
Their love has stood the test of time and defied expectations. They support each other because they are loyal to one another and have always helped each other.
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