I was shocked when my husband, Jake, handed me a schedule to help me “become a better wife.” But instead of losing my temper, I decided to play along. Little did Jake know, I was about to teach him a lesson that would make him rethink his new idea of marriage.
I’ve always been the calm and reasonable one in our relationship. Jake, on the other hand, can easily get caught up in new trends or ideas, whether it’s a hobby or a YouTube video that claims to change his life in just a few easy steps.
Jake and I were fine until he met Steve. Steve was the type of guy who thought being loud made him right. He’d talk over anyone who tried to correct him. He was also always single (no surprise there), but that didn’t stop him from giving relationship advice to all his married friends, including Jake. Jake, who should’ve known better, was impressed by Steve’s confidence.
I didn’t worry about it much at first, but then Jake started saying things like, “Steve says marriages work best when the wife handles the household,” or “Steve thinks women should always look good for their husbands, no matter how long they’ve been married.” I’d roll my eyes and make sarcastic comments, but it was bothering me. Jake was changing. He’d raise an eyebrow if I ordered takeout instead of cooking, and he’d sigh if I let the laundry pile up—forgetting that I also had a full-time job.
Then one night, it happened. Jake came home with The List.
He sat me down, unfolded a piece of paper, and slid it across the table. “I’ve been thinking,” he began, sounding condescending in a way I’d never heard before. “You’re a great wife, Lisa, but there’s room for improvement.”
My eyebrows shot up. “Oh really?”
He nodded, not realizing he was walking into dangerous territory. “Yeah, Steve helped me realize that our marriage could be even better if you, you know, stepped up a bit.”
I looked at the paper in front of me. It was a schedule, titled “Lisa’s Weekly Routine for Becoming a Better Wife.” Jake had actually written out a plan for me based on what Steve—a single guy with no relationship experience—thought I should do to “improve” as a wife.
I was supposed to wake up at 5 a.m. every day to make Jake a gourmet breakfast, then go to the gym to “stay in shape.” After that? Cleaning, laundry, ironing—all before heading to work. Every evening, I was to cook dinner from scratch and make snacks for Jake and his friends when they came over. It was sexist and insulting on so many levels, I didn’t know where to start. I just stared at Jake, wondering if he had lost his mind.
“This will be great for you, and us,” he continued, unaware.
“Steve says it’s important to have structure, and I think you could benefit from—”
“Benefit from what?” I interrupted, keeping my voice calm. Jake blinked, surprised, but quickly recovered.
“Well, from having some guidance and a schedule.”
I wanted to throw the paper in his face, but instead, I surprised myself—I smiled.
“You’re right, Jake,” I said sweetly. “I’m lucky you made me this schedule. I’ll start tomorrow.”
He looked relieved, and I almost felt sorry for him as I stuck the list on the fridge. Almost. He had no idea what was coming.
The next day, I looked at the ridiculous schedule and smiled. If Jake thought he could hand me a list of “improvements,” he was about to learn a lesson. I opened my laptop and started a new document titled, “Jake’s Plan for Becoming the Best Husband Ever.” If he wanted perfection from me, there was a cost.
I started by listing all the things he’d suggested for me, beginning with the gym. “$1,200 for a personal trainer,” I typed, barely holding back a laugh.
Next was the food. If Jake wanted gourmet meals, that wasn’t happening with our current grocery budget. Organic, non-GMO, free-range everything? That wasn’t cheap. “$700 per month for groceries,” I wrote. And if he wanted fancy meals, he’d need cooking lessons too—those were expensive.
I leaned back, laughing as I imagined his face when he saw this. But I wasn’t done. The best part was yet to come.
There was no way I could manage all these demands and keep my job. If Jake wanted me to follow his absurd schedule full-time, he’d have to cover my lost income. I calculated my salary and added it to the list. “$75,000 per year to replace Lisa’s salary since she will now be your full-time maid, chef, and personal assistant.”
By now, I was laughing so hard my stomach hurt.
And just for fun, I added a note about expanding the house. If Jake was going to have friends over all the time, they’d need a separate space. “$50,000 to build a man cave so Jake and his friends don’t disrupt Lisa’s new routine.”
I printed out the list, set it on the kitchen counter, and waited for Jake to come home. When he arrived, he was in a good mood.
“Hey, babe,” he called, spotting the paper. “What’s this?”
Keeping a straight face, I said, “Oh, just a little list to help you become the best husband ever.”
He chuckled, thinking I was playing along, but as he read the list, his smile faded. “$1,200 for a trainer? $700 a month for groceries? What the hell, Lisa?”
I crossed my arms. “Well, you want me to follow your plan, right? I figured we should budget for it.”
His face turned pale as he flipped through the pages. “$75,000 a year? You’re quitting your job?”
“How else can I follow your plan?” I asked. “I can’t work and be the perfect wife, right?”
Jake looked stunned. The numbers and the absurdity of his demands hit him all at once. His smugness disappeared, replaced by the realization that he had messed up.
“I didn’t mean for it to be like this,” he stammered. “I just thought—”
“You thought you could ‘fix’ me like a project?” I said, my voice calm but firm. “Jake, marriage is about respect. And if you ever try to ‘fix’ me like this again, it’ll cost you a lot more than what’s on that paper.”
There was a long silence. Jake sighed and looked at me, defeated.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I didn’t realize how ridiculous it was. Steve made it sound reasonable, but now I see… it’s toxic. I’ve been such a fool.”
I nodded. “Yes, you have. And honestly, Steve has no idea what he’s talking about. Why would you listen to him?”
Jake’s face softened as the truth hit him. “You’re right. He has no clue.”
We tore up both lists, and for the first time in weeks, I felt like we were back on the same team. It was a reminder that marriage isn’t about being perfect—it’s about being better together.
9 things you should never plug into a power strip
When we think of the past, one of the first thoughts that runs through our mind is how people lived without electricity. Nowadays, we can’t even imagine a day without it because all of our appliances and devices run on electricity.
The truth is, however, that most homes don’t have enough power outlets to keep everything running and charged, so most of us rely on power strips without being aware that appliances that consume a lot of energy become dangerous fire hazards when we plug them into a power strip.
Although power strips are the thing to go to when it comes to charging your phone or power an entertainment setup, there are certain devices that should never be plugged into a power strip.
Air conditioners, space heaters, toasters, and other appliances that use high wattage can easily cause power strips to overheat, which can easily lead to a fire hazard.
Even before plugging anything into a power strip consider the ammount of power they support. This is usually listed on the product itself.
High-capacity appliances need to draw a lot of power through an electrical circuit to work. Keep in mind that an appliance does not need to be large in size to draw large amounts of power.
Below is the list of appliances that should never be plugged into a power strip.
1. The oven: Even though the oven is not used continually, it is a power-hungry appliance that should not be plugged into a power strip. In fact, it should be plugged into its own wall outlet on its own circuit.
2. Refrigerator: Refrigerators require a lot of power and frequently cycle on and off which can easily overload a power strip and cause damage. Much like the oven, refrigerators require a wall outlet dedicated solely to powering the appliance.
3. Washing Machine: When turned on, washing machines pull a lot of power. This is the main reason why these appliances shouldn’t share a receptacle with any other appliance or device.
Most washing machines use a max of up to 1400 watts, putting it dangerously close to the max load of most power strips. On top of that while working, washing machines are usually left unattended and work longer hours, at least an hour, which is long enough for a power strip to overheat.
4. Heating: Portable heaters should never be plugged into a power strip because most of them use 1,500 watts of energy on their high setting and they usually run for extended periods of time.
5. Microwave: Since they consume a lot of energy when used, most microwave ovens are plugged into their own receptacle and that is always a good practice.
6. Coffee Maker: Those who own a coffee maker are not fully aware of the power these appliances use, and this is why they should never be plugged into any sort of power strip or extension cord.
7. Toaster: You may think that browning up slices of bread or bagels doesn’t require a lot of energy, but the truth is that toasters use a lot of energy when in use and they should be plugged directly into the receptacle rather than a power strip.
8. Another Power Strip: Power strips are not meant to be used in conjunction with another power strip, although many people do exactly that. This, however, violates most safety codes because it can easily lead to overloading the electrical system.
9. Electronics (Computer, TV, Router): These types of electronic devices don’t necessarily use a lot of power on their own, but they are sensitive to surges and you can find yourself with a burnt out computer or TV very quickly if you plug them into a power strip.
If you want to protect these sensitive devices from power surges, opt for a power strip that functions as a surge protector.
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