
I was stunned when my husband, Jake, handed me a schedule to help me “become a better wife.” But instead of blowing up, I played along.Little did Jake know, I was about to teach him a lesson that would make him rethink his newfound approach to marriage.
I’ve always prided myself on being the level-headed one in our marriage. Jake, bless his heart, could get swept up in things pretty easily, whether it was a new hobby, or some random YouTube video that promised to change his life in three easy steps.
But we were solid until Jake met Steve. Steve was the type of guy who thought being loudly opinionated made him right, the type that talks right over you when you try to correct him.
He was also a perpetually single guy (who could have guessed?), who graciously dispensed relationship advice to all his married colleagues, Jake included. Jake should’ve known better, but my darling husband was positively smitten with Steve’s confidence.
I didn’t think much of it until Jake started making some noxious comments.
“Steve says relationships work best when the wife takes charge of the household,” he’d say. Or “Steve thinks it’s important for women to look good for their husbands, no matter how long they’ve been married.”
I’d roll my eyes and reply with some sarcastic remark, but it was getting under my skin. Jake was changing. He’d arch his eyebrows if I ordered takeout instead of cooking, and sigh when I let the laundry pile up because, God forbid, I had my own full-time job.
And then it happened. One night, he came home with The List.
He sat me down at the kitchen table, unfolded a piece of paper, and slid it across to me.
“I’ve been thinking,” he started, his voice dripping with a condescending tone I hadn’t heard from him before. “You’re a great wife, Lisa. But there’s room for improvement.”
My eyebrows shot up. “Oh really?”
He nodded, oblivious to the danger zone he was entering. “Yeah. Steve helped me realize that our marriage could be even better if you, you know, stepped up a bit.”
I stared at the paper in front of me. It was a schedule… and he’d written “Lisa’s Weekly Routine for Becoming a Better Wife” at the top in bold.
This guy had actually sat down and mapped out my entire week based on what Steve — a single guy with zero relationship experience — thought I should do to “improve” myself as a wife.
I was supposed to wake up at 5 a.m. every day to make Jake a gourmet breakfast. Then I’d hit the gym for an hour to “stay in shape.”
After that? A delightful lineup of chores: cleaning, laundry, ironing. And that was all before I left for work. I was supposed to cook a meal from scratch every evening and make fancy snacks for Jake and his friends when they came over to hang out at our place.
The whole thing was sexist and insulting on so many levels I didn’t even know where to start. I ended up staring at him, wondering if my husband had lost his mind.
“This will be great for you, and us,” he continued, oblivious.
“Steve says it’s important to maintain structure, and I think you could benefit from —”
“I could benefit from what?” I interrupted, my voice dangerously calm. Jake blinked, caught off guard by the interruption, but he recovered quickly.
“Well, you know, from having some guidance and a schedule.”
I wanted to throw that paper in his face and ask him if he’d developed a death wish. Instead, I did something that surprised even me: I smiled.
“You’re right, Jake,” I said sweetly. “I’m so lucky that you made me this schedule. I’ll start tomorrow.”
The relief on his face was instant. I almost felt sorry for him as I got up and stuck the list on the fridge. Almost. He had no idea what was coming.
The next day, I couldn’t help but smirk as I studied the ridiculous schedule again. If Jake thought he could hand me a list of “improvements,” then he was about to find out just how much structure our life could really handle.
I pulled out my laptop, opened up a fresh document, and titled it, “Jake’s Plan for Becoming the Best Husband Ever.” He wanted a perfect wife? Fine. But there was a cost to perfection.
I began by listing all the things he had suggested for me, starting with the gym membership he was so keen on. It was laughable, really.
“$1,200 for a personal trainer.” I typed, barely containing my giggle.
Next came the food. If Jake wanted to eat like a king, that wasn’t happening on our current grocery budget. Organic, non-GMO, free-range everything? That stuff didn’t come cheap.
“$700 per month for groceries,” I wrote. He’d probably need to chip in for a cooking class too. Those were pricey, but hey, perfection wasn’t free.
I leaned back in my chair, laughing to myself as I imagined Jake’s face when he saw this. But I wasn’t done. Oh no, the pièce de résistance was still to come.
See, there was no way I could juggle all these expectations while holding down my job. If Jake wanted me to dedicate myself full-time to his absurd routine, then he’d have to compensate for the loss of my income.
I pulled up a calculator, estimating the value of my salary. Then, I added it to the list, complete with a little note: “$75,000 per year to replace Lisa’s salary since she will now be your full-time personal assistant, maid, and chef.”
My stomach hurt from laughing at this point.
And just for good measure, I threw in a suggestion about him needing to expand the house. After all, if he was going to have his friends over regularly, they’d need a dedicated space that wouldn’t intrude on my newly organized, impossibly structured life.
“$50,000 to build a separate ‘man cave’ so Jake and his friends don’t disrupt Lisa’s schedule.”
By the time I was done, the list was a masterpiece. A financial and logistical nightmare, sure, but a masterpiece nonetheless. It wasn’t just a counterattack — it was a wake-up call.
I printed it out, set it neatly on the kitchen counter, and waited for Jake to come home. When he finally walked through the door that evening, he was in a good mood.
“Hey, babe,” he called out, dropping his keys on the counter. He spotted the paper almost immediately. “What’s this?”
I kept my face neutral, fighting the urge to laugh as I watched him pick it up. “Oh, it’s just a little list I put together for you,” I said sweetly, “to help you become the best husband ever.”
Jake chuckled, thinking I was playing along with his little game. But as he scanned the first few lines, the grin started to fade. I could see the wheels turning in his head, the slow realization that this wasn’t the lighthearted joke he thought it was.
“Wait… what is all this?” He squinted at the numbers, his eyes widening as he saw the total costs. “$1,200 for a personal trainer? $700 a month for groceries? What the hell, Lisa?”
I leaned against the kitchen island, crossing my arms.
“Well, you want me to wake up at 5 a.m., hit the gym, make gourmet breakfasts, clean the house, cook dinner, and host your friends. I figured we should budget for all of that, don’t you think?”
His face turned pale as he flipped through the pages. “$75,000 a year? You’re quitting your job?!”
I shrugged. “How else am I supposed to follow your plan? I can’t work and be the perfect wife, right?”
He stared at the paper, dumbfounded.
The numbers, the absurdity of his own demands, it all hit him at once. His smugness evaporated, replaced by a dawning realization that he had seriously, seriously messed up.
“I… I didn’t mean…” Jake stammered, looking at me with wide eyes. “Lisa, I didn’t mean for it to be like this. I just thought —”
It’s on her hands!

When you’re on a record-breaking world tour, you have to keep performing even if you feel like you could get a cold. Taylor Swift showed her professionalism over the weekend as she handled a runny nose during her performance in Edinburgh.

Taylor Swift’s Unstoppable Performance in the Cold

The Pennsylvania-born pop singer was seen blowing into her fingers several times during the Scottish event before smearing it over her sparkling frock. This occurred on the first leg of her UK tour. The 34-year-old Taylor Swift’s three performances at Murrayfield Stadium last weekend drew almost 219,000 spectators.
The frigid air in the stadium did not help the singer’s plight, even though summer is just a few days away. Particularly when the pop star was seen wiping her nose while playing the smash song “Don’t Blame Me,” some have blamed the incident on the cold. The temperature fell below 46.4 degrees Fahrenheit on the night of the show. In the video, the singer can be seen pumping snot into her palms, letting it drip, and then wiping it on her skirt.
Different Reactions from the Viewers

Some fans have even accused the musical sensation of flicking mucus in their way while she braved the conditions that turned her nose red. Many on social media expressed their disgust, despite the fact that several people offered their sympathies. Someone said, “Taylor Swift blew her nose and snot on her skirt on stage.” Additionally, fans have seen Taylor licking the snot out of her nose.
Another person looked horrified and yelled, “Someone please give Taylor Swift some tissues.” I’ve observed her clean her nose with her hands so many times in the previous few days that it’s absurd. I get that she’s performing, but there has to be a method to make sure she always has Kleenex.
Help from a Select Group of Fans

However, other people backed Taylor Swift with the remark, “I’m not even a Swiftie, but I seriously don’t get why anyone would be mad or disgusted by someone wiping their nose.” Really, people? What was she supposed to do? Even if it’s unlikely that she had a tissue close by, at least she wasn’t wanting snot all over her face.
The UK Tour Continues

Taylor Swift gave three performances in Edinburgh to kick off the British singer’s tour. Eight nights at Wembley and evenings in Cardiff and Liverpool will follow. where 720,000 fans will be present alone in London. Following the European tour, Taylor will make nine more stops in the United States, including Miami, New Orleans, and Indianapolis. 53 US dates have already been completed by her. She has committed to performing in fifty cities across Europe.
Fan Loyalty and Its Impact on the Economy

Several ardent Taylor Swift admirers began to create lines 48 hours before the celebrity even made it to the city for her tour. A whopping 220,000 individuals are waiting impatiently to see and buy things. However, a lot of individuals in Edinburgh had trouble getting housing due to the quick reservations made for hotels. Despite charging three times as much for the superstar’s three-night stay from June 7 to June 9.
Her Eras tour is predicted to boost the British economy by about £1 billion. Apart from the ticket price, supporters are required to cover the expenses for accommodation, travel, a pre-concert meal, and official merchandise. Many will also buy new clothes specifically for this historic occasion. According to research, each Swiftie who sees their idol perform live in the UK will pay, on average, £848.
Ticket Controversy: Excessive Demand Worldwide

Since her Scottish premiere this past weekend, UK fans have been grumbling about how tough it is to get tickets. This is a result of Americans buying UK television series. Fans expressed their dissatisfaction with some of the guests’ flights on social media after the performance, given that the artist hasn’t performed in Scotland in eight years.
Americans countered that they couldn’t get tickets in their state and remarked that dates in Europe are far less expensive because of the strong currency. 4.35 million tickets have been sold to Swiftie fans worldwide, but due to the extremely high demand, fans have had difficulty obtaining tickets to shows.
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