My name is Sarah, and my life started with tragedy. When I was two years old, my mother died in a terrible car accident, and soon after, my father left us. My grandparents stepped in, becoming my guardians and the center of my world. They supported me through life’s challenges and helped me graduate high school, enabling me to attend a prestigious college.
Graduation day was filled with excitement. I had always dreamed of this moment, imagining my grandparents watching proudly as I received my diploma. I thought about how this achievement was for them, a recognition of their love and sacrifices.
As I walked toward the ceremony, a man unexpectedly called my name. He looked kind yet weathered, and though I didn’t recognize him, something about him felt familiar. He introduced himself as my father, which shocked me since I believed he had abandoned us when I was young.
He shared that he had been searching for me, claiming my grandparents had kept me from him. He showed me a photo of us together from my childhood, and confusion filled my mind. I had been told he left us. He then revealed messages from my grandmother urging him to stay away, deepening my sense of betrayal.
I was torn between anger and sadness, questioning why my grandparents would lie to me. I turned to see them waving in the crowd, blissfully unaware of my turmoil. Overwhelmed, I walked toward them, my feelings boiling over.
I demanded that they leave, my voice shaking with emotion. My grandmother’s smile faded as she asked what was wrong, her eyes filling with tears. My grandfather looked shocked and asked to talk, but I shouted that they had lied about my father for years and that I couldn’t believe it. My father put a comforting hand on my shoulder, acknowledging how hard this was for me.
After the ceremony, I sat with my father in a quiet café, both of us sipping cold coffee as I asked him to explain everything. He revealed that when my parents were together, my grandparents disapproved of him, believing he wasn’t good enough for my mother. The tension between them grew after I was born.
I wanted to understand why he hadn’t tried to find me sooner. He showed me more harsh messages from my grandmother, revealing their protective yet misleading nature. I learned that my father had always wanted to be part of my life but had been kept away. I asked why he had come to my graduation, and he explained he found out about it from an old friend. He wanted to see me and celebrate my success, hoping it was finally time to reconnect.
As I processed his words, the weight of my grandparents’ deception and the sudden appearance of my father sank in. Graduation had brought more than a diploma; it revealed truths that would forever change my family dynamics. I realized I needed time to sort through these revelations and figure out my relationships with both my father and the grandparents who had raised me with good intentions but under a shroud of secrecy.
Barry Manilow explains why he waited decades to come out as gay
During a guest appearance on HBO’s Who’s Talking to Chris Wallace, the 80-year-old Copacabana singer said he didn’t think it was important to announce his sexuality during the earlier decades of his career.
Manilow came out in 2017, almost three years after he married his husband and manager Garry Kief in a private ceremony. The couple have been together for 45 years now, though they’ve kept much of their relationship away from the public eye.
When he came out to People magazine in 2017, Manilow — whose real name is Barry Pincus — worried he’d be “disappointing” some of his fans by revealing his sexuality. Instead, Manilow, who was 73 at the time, said the reaction from his fanbase was “beautiful.”
Despite his current feelings of nonchalance about his own coming out, Manilow said announcing his sexuality as his career was booming would have been a bad idea.
“Now being gay is no big deal,” he explained. “Back in the ’70s it would have killed a career.”
Regardless, the usually very private Manilow said he thinks “everybody knew that Garry and I were a couple all those years.”
“Really, Garry and I’ve been together for so long,” he said. “It just never dawned on me that we’re going to come out. But when we got married, it was a big deal, so we did.”
Manilow credited Kief for saving his life. He said he is thankful he had Kief to support him as his music career was taking off, despite keeping their relationship under wraps.
“As my career exploded, it was just crazy. And, you know, going back to an empty hotel room, you can get into a lot of trouble if you’re alone night after night after night,” Manilow explained. “But I met Garry right around when it was exploding. And I didn’t have to go back to those empty hotel rooms. I had somebody to cry with or to celebrate with.”
Manilow said he did not wish an isolated hotel room for any young people.
“It was pretty lonely until I met Garry. And then it was fun,” he smiled.
Kief is not Manilow’s first spouse. In 1964, Manilow married his high school sweetheart, Susan Deixler. They were married for one year.
Manilow told CNN’s Wallace he “really did love” Deixler, but added “the gay thing was pretty, pretty strong. I couldn’t deny it.”
The singer said he knew he was gay before marrying Deixler, but their marriage ended because Manilow couldn’t be the committed husband his then-wife needed. He revealed that his sexuality was not the reason his marriage failed.
“We had a very nice marriage, it was great, but I was away every night making music, as a young musician would be,” Manilow described. “It wasn’t good for me, and it wasn’t good for her.”
“I couldn’t be the proper husband,” he continued. “I was out making music every night, sowing my wild oats. I wasn’t ready to settle down.”
Brooklyn-born Manilow skyrocketed to international fame in 1974 after his release of the ever-popular pop-rock ballad Mandy. He became one of the biggest-selling musicians of all time. Prior to his success as a singer-songwriter, Manilow was behind a number of famous commercial jingles for brands like State Farm and Band-Aid — a gig that he has said helped him create catchy hooks for his own hit songs.
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