‘Families don’t have to match’ – Black couple share their journey to adopting three white children

Sadie and Jarvis Sampson tried everything for years to get pregnant, and eventually they accepted that they would only ever be aunt and uncle. Then, one day, they received a text that completely turned their world upside down.

Since getting married in January 2018, the pair has been trying to get pregnant, so when that didn’t work out naturally, they tried everything else.

The Houston mother told Love What Matters, “Ovulation tests, prenatal vitamins, cycle tracking apps, fertility monitors.”

“We didn’t even try our luck at following the unsolicited counsel of strangers, friends, and family. We tried, prayed, and waited for fourteen months. Month after Month. pregnancy test negative following negative test. It appeared like we would require help getting pregnant. We even went so far as to discuss it with medical professionals.

The couple seemed to get little assistance from the doctors. Sadie was advised by everyone that she would get pregnant if she reduced weight. Since she had no other options, she underwent gastric surgery and shed 28 pounds.’

“She informed me that since she was unable to give me the fertility medication, she would refer me to a fertility specialist if I wasn’t pregnant within six months,” Sadie recalled. I was ecstatic to hear that. We finally received a response other than “no”! We were ecstatic to hear “not right now.”

Unfortunately, though, the couple felt as though they had begun over after Sadie lost the weight and they were unable to conceive.

Connecting the Dots – Adoption Puzzle Fundraising EventAs everyone is aware, we received a call regarding our little two weeks ago.

Published on Friday, August 30, 2019 by Sadie Sampson

Sadie said, “I had always felt like I was meant to be a mother.” “I was still not pregnant even though my surgeon had spent a long time to warn me about how fertile I would be following surgery. Thus, we gave up. We came to the realization that our only destiny was to be our nieces’ aunts and uncles and our goddaughters’ godparents.

The couple had just come to the painful conclusion that they would not be able to conceive when Sadie’s friend texted her to ask if they would be willing to foster a child that a couple she knew was thinking about for themselves.

At first, the couple was apprehensive since they had been instructed by a caseworker to look after the child while the mother sought therapy. The couple was concerned that they would grow overly devoted to the child. But soon after, the narrative was altered.

The caseworker stated, “The birth mother decided she would prefer you guys adopt the child instead.”

“Holy crap!!” was the first thing Sadie uttered out loud when she learned she was expecting a child.

“Overnight, we went from not having any kids to possibly fostering one to, ‘You guys are parents!’” Still in shock, I listened to the caseworker as she spoke. After hanging up, I dialed my spouse! “Baby!” They desire that we adopt the child! They want us to have kids,” I cried out. Hold on! Really? He exclaimed, “I assumed they just wanted us to foster him.” “Nope!” “They want us to be his parents,” I remarked.

Over the weekend, the couple not only processed the surprising news but also braced themselves in case the mother had second thoughts.

On Monday, the mother not only expressed her desire for them to adopt the child, but also stated that she was prepared to sign the adoption papers independently.

At 33 weeks, their son had been born—seven weeks ahead of schedule. His weight was 4 lbs. 5 oz. Sadie writes, “He fit in one of my husband’s hands.”

Sadie said, “He was so small, swaddled in a white blanket with stripes of pink and blue.” He was early, therefore he couldn’t eat on his own, thus an NG tube was coming out of his nose. But my goodness, was he adorable!

The couple was urged to create a registry after they announced their announcement on social media. In just three days, 55 of the 72 goods they had advertised had been purchased.

Following the adoption of Ezra Lee, which was completed in October 2020, the couple had the cutest family portraits shot, sporting t-shirts that said, “Families don’t have to match.”

Through embryo donation, Sadie and Jarvis became parents to twin twins, Destinee and Journey, in 2021. The black couple, adhering to their family credo, “Families don’t have to match,” gave birth to three white children: two girls and one boy.

There is just one reaction for anyone who judges this lovely family: love is the strongest foundation there is.

On Our Anniversary, My Husband Presented Me with a Bill Summarizing How Much I ‘Cost’ Him Over the Years – He Insisted I Repay the Amount

Five years ago, Ava stood at the altar, ready to start a new life with the man she loved. But tonight, her dreams lay shattered on the kitchen table. They were replaced by a cruel reality: a spreadsheet calculating the “cost” of her love.

“There’s something important I need to talk about,” my husband, Daniel, said, his voice unusually strained. At that point, my excitement for our fancy anniversary dinner sizzled out faster than a forgotten birthday candle.

We had reservations at 8 p.m., and all afternoon I’d been looking for the perfect outfit for our little Ben, while also folding mountains of laundry and reheating last night’s dinner.

Being a full-time stay-at-home mother wasn’t easy, especially when I had to look after my one-year-old son.

I met Daniel at the bustling investment firm where I used to work. My brain, sharp as a tack, thrived in the fast-paced world of finance.

Numbers danced in my head like a well-rehearsed ballet.

But then, the doctor’s words shattered our dreams like a dropped crystal vase.

“Infertility,” he said. “There might be some complications with conceiving naturally.”

Later that night, curled up on the couch with takeout boxes scattered around us, we talked. “Maybe it’s not meant to be,” I whispered as tears rolled down my cheeks.

Daniel cupped my face, his thumb wiping away a stray tear. “Ava,” he said. “If anything, this makes me want you more. We’ll figure this out, together. Maybe adoption…”

The seed of hope he planted took root in my heart.

That night, we made a pact to face whatever challenges came our way, as long as we faced them together.

Marriage wasn’t just about having a family, it was about building a life with the person who made you feel whole, even when pieces seemed missing.

A few months later, standing at the altar, tears welled up in my eyes again, this time a mixture of joy and relief. “I do,” I whispered.

As he kissed me that day, I felt lucky to have him by my side.

Soon, fertility treatments became our new normal. One evening, after a particularly grueling round of tests, I found Daniel staring out the window. He looked defeated.

“Maybe it’s time I resign,” I offered. My career, once a source of immense pride, felt insignificant compared to the yearning in my heart.

Daniel turned around. “Are you sure? You love your job.”

“There’s something more important,” I said, taking his hand. “You. Us. Building our family and looking after this house. I think I need to be at home more than anywhere else.”

With a hesitant nod, Daniel agreed.

Soon after I resigned, a new chapter of my life unfolded.

It was filled with doctor visits, support groups, and the quiet ache of longing. But through it all, Daniel was my rock.

Finally, after lots of medicine and appointments, Ben arrived. We were so emotional when we first looked at our tiny miracle wrapped in a blanket.

Our little family, messy and perfect all at once, became my whole world.

Last Monday was our fifth anniversary. I couldn’t believe it had been five years since we tied the knot. Time flies, doesn’t it?

The last five years felt like five decades of laughter, late-night talks, and shoulder-to-shoulder battles through life’s storms.

Looking back, a warm wave of gratitude washed over me for having Daniel by my side.

Excitement bubbled as I envisioned a romantic dinner, a night to celebrate this milestone. I couldn’t wait to see the surprise in Daniel’s eyes when I revealed the reservation I’d snagged at that fancy Italian place we always talked about.

Grabbing my phone, I dialed his number. “Hey, honey! Guess what?” I chirped.

“Hey,” he answered. “What’s up?”

“Just thinking about tonight! Where are we planning to go? Do you have anything special planned?”

A beat of silence followed, then, “Ava, there’s no need to go anywhere fancy. We’re not doing anything special tonight. No presents either.”

“Oh,” I managed, the disappointment clinging to me like a damp sweater.

“Just wait at home, okay? I’ll be there soon. We need to talk.”

Then, the line went dead, leaving me staring at the phone. What could be so important to ruin our anniversary night? Why was Daniel acting like that?

I was sitting in the living room, watching Ben play with his toy cars when the front door creaked open. Daniel walked in. His shoulders were slumped and he didn’t look like the confident man who returned home from work every day.

“Hey,” I greeted. “Rough day?”

“Yeah, something like that,” he mumbled.

A knot of worry tightened in my stomach. Daniel rarely brought work stress home, and his silence was deafening.

“What’s going on?” I asked.

“Just… come here,” he said, heading towards the kitchen.

I followed him, and he pulled out a chair for me after reaching the kitchen table.

“Sit,” he said.

“Is everything alright?” I asked, my voice tinged with worry.

“Not really,” Daniel replied coldly.

Then, he shuffled some papers on the table.

“What is it, Daniel?”

“There’s something important I need to talk about,” he said, his gaze meeting mine. “I’ve thought a lot about this and I finally decided to discuss it with you.”

I felt a shiver crawl down my spine. Something important? What could it be?

“Look at these,” he pushed the papers across the table towards me.

Curious, I quickly picked up the document and scanned it. The papers were filled with numbers and columns. I could tell it was a budget breakdown.

“What am I supposed to be looking at?”

“I’ll explain,” Daniel said.

He took a deep breath before dropping the bomb that turned my life upside down.

“I took some time to calculate how much you have cost me over the years together, and this is devastating,” he began. “By now, with this money, I could have bought a house or a private jet. But all I have is a wife sitting at home and living off me. I need you to pay it back to me before I start resenting you for all of my wasted potential.”

His words hit me like a physical blow. I was speechless.

After all the years I’d dedicated to their family, after all the sacrifices I’d made, he had the audacity to accuse me of wasting his potential. How could he do this to me?

This was so much more than a bad anniversary present; it was heartbreaking.

“Okay,” I managed to say. “I will pay you back, but only if you give me some time to figure out how.”

“Sure,” he said as he rose from his seat and turned around. “I can wait. I’m glad you understood what I wanted to say.”

“I understood more than you think,” I looked into his eyes. “But you better believe, this conversation isn’t over.”

Not only did Daniel waste the anniversary dinner reservation that evening, but he also broke my heart into a million pieces.

Looking at those papers, it was clear he’d calculated every penny he’d spent on me, including the groceries I’d bought to feed our family. I couldn’t believe the audacity of the man I’d married.

The final number scrawled at the bottom nearly took my breath away. $300,000.

That was supposedly the cost of my life with him over the past four years, after I’d given up my own career to raise Ben and manage our household.

Seeing those numbers on the document fueled a fire in my gut. He was going to learn a very expensive lesson.

Over the next few days, a simmering rage kept me company. While Daniel seemed oblivious and went about his routine as if nothing had happened, I spent my nights meticulously documenting the value of everything I’d contributed to our marriage.

The cooking, the cleaning, the emotional support… it all went on a spreadsheet. I even included the salary I’d sacrificed by choosing to be his stay-at-home wife.

The once lively atmosphere of our house had been choked by a thick silence. Daniel would try to make conversation, but my responses were clipped and short.

Suddenly, the man sleeping next to me at night felt like a stranger. How could I have given so much of myself to someone who saw me as a financial burden? I felt so disgusted with each passing hour.

Four days later, I faced him across the kitchen table again. However, this time I had a file clutched in my hand. My heart pounded in my chest as I placed it in front of him.

“What’s this?” he asked.

“Your bill.”

He opened the folder, his eyes widening as he scanned the document. The total amount was scrawled at the bottom in bold. It was $500,000.

“This can’t be right,” he stammered, his voice laced with panic. “There’s no way…”

“There you go,” I interrupted. “Seems my contributions to this marriage were worth a bit more than groceries and rent, wouldn’t you say?”

He sputtered, speechless for once. The color drained from his face, leaving him pale and shaken.

“Ava, I… I never meant for things to get this way. I was just stressed, and…”

“Don’t,” I cut him off. “Respect and understanding are the pillars of any marriage, Daniel. And right now, all I see are cracks in the foundation.”

This wasn’t just about money anymore; it was about the very essence of our relationship. And as much as it pained me, I knew the truth. I knew I couldn’t stay with him anymore.

“I’ve already talked to my lawyer,” I continued, my voice firm. “We’re done, Daniel. We’re done.”

This whole ordeal taught me one thing loud and clear: my worth is more than a number on a spreadsheet, and I deserve to be with someone who sees that. What do you think?

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