I grew up believing that my father blamed me for my mother’s death but the truth was heartbreaking.
I never knew my mother, and my father never spoke about her. All I knew was that she had been very beautiful, because of the picture that hung on my father’s study wall, and that she had died very young.
My father was a sad man, a quiet and distant man. I wanted him to notice me, and to love me, but he never did. He rarely spoke to me beyond the perfunctory hello and goodbye, good morning and goodnight. I would have given anything for him to sweep me into his arms and tell me he loved me.
The shadow of my mother’s death followed me my whole life | Source: Shutterstock.com
This strange and strained relationship with my father continued until I was 18, and by then I was a sad and lonely young woman who believed my father hated me. If my father didn’t love me, who would?
But the answer to all my questions was about to be delivered in the most painful and cruel way. My father was hosting a party for his business associates, and among them was a woman whom I knew slightly.
If you don’t leave the past behind you, you deny yourself a future.
I had the feeling that she and my father had a past together — or at least that she wished they did. She greeted me and we started chatting — inconsequential talk about nothing special — and my father walked by.
I gave him my best smile, but he immediately glanced away. The woman saw it all. “Do you know why?” she asked.
I grew up feeling that my father hated me | Source: Unsplash
“Why what?” I asked, confused.
“Why he hates you,” she said.
“My father doesn’t hate me!” I exclaimed. “He’s just not a very demonstrative man.”
“So you don’t know…” she smiled. It was the ugliest smile I’d ever seen. I was about to walk away when she said, “He believes you killed your mother, Karen.”
One day at a party someone told me the truth | Source: Unsplash
I stopped in my tracks. “What?” I gasped.
“Your mother died giving birth to you, surely you know that?” she said.
“No…” I answered. “No, I didn’t know.” I turned my back on her and went looking for my grandmother, my father’s mother, the woman who’d raised me and never told me about my mother’s death.
“How did my mother die?” I asked her angrily. “Was it in childbirth?”
My mother had died in childbirth | Source: Pexels
My grandmother shook her head. “Please Karen, your father asked me never to speak of this with you.”
“I have the right to know about my own mother!” I cried. “I have the right to know why my father hates me!”
Then a quiet angry voice behind me said, “I don’t hate you, Karen, but your mother’s death is none of your business:”
I turned to face my father. “My mother’s death is none of my business? You’re wrong! I killed her, didn’t I? That’s what you think each time you look at me!”
My father blamed me for her death | Source: Unsplash
The expression in his eyes sent me running out of the door. I got into my car and drove aimlessly, tears running down my face. In my distress, I didn’t see the oncoming car changing lanes until it was too late.
I woke up in the hospital linked to a beeping machine, with a dull promise of pain twinging through my whole body. Sitting by my side and holding my hand was my father.
“Karen,” he said softly, “Thank God you’re alright!”
“Daddy…” I whispered, “you’re here!”
Tears came into his eyes. “Of course I’m here. I don’t hate you, Karen. I love you. And I don’t blame you for your mother’s death, I blame myself. When your mom and I married we were very poor.
“All we had were dreams and our love for each other. Then she fell pregnant and I took on a second job. I knew we’d need the money when you came along. I was working 16-hour days and she spent a lot of time alone.
“So one day when I came home she wasn’t there. A neighbor had taken her to the hospital. When I got there it was all over. Your mother had died, and I hadn’t been there for her.
The accident nearly cost me my life | Source: Pexels
“I didn’t blame you, Karen, I blamed myself. I was determined I wasn’t going to fail you the way I’d failed her, so I threw myself into my work, and I became a rich man.
“Daddy, how could you blame yourself?” I asked. “There was nothing you could have done!”
“I could have been there, holding her hand the way I’m holding yours now,” he said.
“But daddy…” I hesitated, “you were always so angry with me, so cold. You ran away from me.”
My father and I were reconciled | Source: Unsplash
“Karen, you look just like your mother, and each time I looked at you, my heart was torn apart by grief and guilt. It took nearly losing you to make me realize what I’d done. I love you.”
For the first time in my life, my father put his arms around me and showed me that he loved me. It was a new beginning for both of us, and I like to believe my mother was smiling down from heaven.
What can we learn from this story?
- If you don’t leave the past behind you, you deny yourself a future. Karen’s father was so lost in his pain that he nearly lost the opportunity to have a wonderful relationship with his daughter.
- The truth can heal old wounds and open the way to a new beginning. It was only after Karen and her father spoke about their estrangement that they could move past their misunderstandings.
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If you enjoyed this story, you might like this one about a man who left his widowed mother homeless.
This account is inspired by our reader’s story but written by a professional writer. All names have been changed to protect identities and ensure privacy. Share your story with us, maybe it will change someone’s life.
I Decided to Surprise My Husband at Work Only to Discover He Was on Vacation
I thought I would surprise my husband with lunch at work, but I discovered he was on vacation. The following day, skeptical and bewildered, I followed him and discovered a startling secret at my sister’s place. I was forced to reevaluate all of my assumptions about my marriage and my family after what I discovered.
Last Tuesday, I made the decision to surprise Ben at work with lunch. I had prepared his favorite dish, lasagna, all morning. I had some alone time with the kids at school, so I thought it would be a kind gesture. What spouse wouldn’t appreciate receiving a handmade meal and a surprise visit from his wife?
The receptionist at his office looked at me quizzically when I arrived.
She asked, staring at the lasagna in my hands, “You’re here for Ben?”
Yes, I simply wanted to take him lunch. Is he present?
She paused. “Ben has spent the last two weeks on vacation.”
I stood there in shock, attempting to take in what she had said. On vacation? He had informed me that he would be working late every day this week. I felt a knot form in my stomach and a chilly perspiration appear on my forehead. I departed after thanking her.
I attempted to figure it out at home. Perhaps there was miscommunication. However, what sort of miscommunication endures for two weeks? I had a persistent sense that something was seriously wrong. So I resolved to follow him the next day, as any suspicious wife would do.
I requested Mom to watch the kids for the day over the phone the next morning. I told her I needed to run some errands. She didn’t notice the chaos growing inside of me; she was just delighted to help. I decided to follow Ben to see for myself what was actually going on.
I kept my distance as I watched him leave the home and get into his car. He arrived at Kate’s—my sister’s—house after driving across town.
As I watched him get out of the automobile, my jaw fell open. Kate emerged, giving him a loving welcome and guiding him inside.
My thoughts became empty. Did Ben and my sister have an affair? It was unbelievable to me, but was there any other explanation? Tears welled up in me, the anguish of betrayal cutting deep. I needed to be certain.
After parking my automobile a little distance from Kate’s residence, I contacted my attorney, Carla. She had previously managed a few legal issues for us, so I trusted her opinion. With a voice trembling with hurt and anger, I told her everything.
“Julia, get some hard evidence before you jump to conclusions,” Carla replied in a composed and businesslike tone. It’s crucial to be certain before pursuing legal action.
I was aware of her correctness. I returned to Kate’s place and started to prowl around like a spies. Even though I felt absurd, I wanted to find out. I looked in a window.
I went inside and noticed a stack of papers and Ben and Kate hunched over lunch at the kitchen table. They appeared serious, and they occasionally cast glances around as though they were afraid of being discovered.
What schemes did they have in mind? I was more and more certain that something was seriously wrong the more I watched. They weren’t merely having an affair; they had plans.
Hands shaking, I took a couple pictures with my phone. I required evidence, something tangible with which to challenge Ben. My imagination was racing with horrible scenarios of all kinds. What actions did they take?
From my car, I made James a call. He detected the first ring. My brother-in-law James has always been the family’s practical one. He was the cool-headed, steady contrast to Kate’s more impetuous personality, having been married to her for almost ten years.
He and Ben got along well, frequently connecting over their passion for cooking and sports. I had faith in James, and I knew he could help me understand this.
It’s Julia, James. I must speak with you regarding Ben and Kate.
A pause occurred. “Calm down, Julia. What is happening?
My voice trembling, I blurted out, “I think they’re having an affair.”
James exhaled. “Julia, please come on over.” Right now.
With terror and betrayal racing through my head, I ran back to Kate’s place. James’ vehicle was already parked outside when I got there. I slipped up to the home and peered in the window once more. James was seated at the kitchen table with Ben and Kate.
Through the partially open window, I could hear brief chunks of their conversation.
James said, seeming worried, “Julia called me.” “She believes you two are having an affair and is worried sick.”
Ben gave a nod. That means she doesn’t know everything.
“That’s fantastic!” With enthusiasm in her voice, Kate answered.
“Our strategy is working,” Ben continued.
My heart broke. I was done listening. I stormed into the home, fury exploding in me.
“You traitors, you who lie and cheat! How could you subject me to this?
Ben and Kate gave me a shocked expression. James got up and tried to reassure me.
“Please, Julia, allow us to clarify.”
“What should I explain? that my sister is the object of my husband’s infidelity?” Tears were flowing down my face as I yelled.
In an attempt to reassure me, Ben remarked gently, “Julia, it’s not what you think.” “I worked on a surprise for you while I was on vacation.”
I gave a sour laugh. “A revelation? Is it unexpected to meet at Kate’s place every day?
“Yes,” Ben responded in a firm voice. “I had intended to fulfill your dream. You’ve always mentioned wanting to open a coffee shop, correct?
I blinked, not sure what to think. “What?”
Kate moved forward while carrying a stack of documents. “Ben has been purchasing a coffee shop for you with his inheritance. Here, we have been working on the company plan and all the related legal documentation.
My frustration began to give way to perplexity and a flicker of hope. “A coffee shop? For me, please?
After giving me a nod, Ben took out a folder and gave it to me. “See, these are the files. Everything from the restoration ideas to the lease. I waited for it to be flawless before telling you. I wanted to make sure James and Kate, who are co-investors, are fully on board.
I peered at the documents, tears clouding my vision as I read them. Everything was in one place. The coffee shop I had always imagined was the evidence of his devotion and love. Ben stopped me before I collapsed because my knees gave up.
How awful it is, Ben. I truly apologize. I considered… I believed you to be.
He gave me a hard hug and whispered, “I know.” “I wanted it to be a surprise, but I should have told you.” When I gave you the keys, I wanted to see your face.
“I cry so much into his chest, I’m such an idiot.” “I truly apologize.”
“Shhh, don’t worry. I can see why you had such feelings. But I do adore you, Julia. I’d never turn on you.
I felt the weight of my error as I nodded. “I’m grateful, Ben. I am very grateful for what you have done.
We went to sign the last set of documents the following day. We owned the coffee shop. It was hard for me to believe. I was ecstatic as soon as I entered the charming little area and could smell the aroma of freshly baked pastries.
Ben gave me a tight squeeze. “Baby, this is all for you. I have faith in you.
I grinned, happy tears rolling down my cheeks. “Love, I adore you. I appreciate your confidence in me.
Together, we transformed the coffee shop into a wonderful place. It developed into a place where hopes were realized and where trust and love were the key components of every dish.
In retrospect, I see how crucial communication and trust are to a relationship. Misunderstandings can occur, but what matters most is how we respond to them.
The smell of freshly baked goodies filled my coffee shop as I stood there feeling appreciative of Ben’s constant love and support. Together, we had weathered the storm and emerged stronger.
Sometimes all it takes to see the reality behind the secrets is a little trust and a lot of love, so to anyone out there who feels like their relationship is in peril. And occasionally, such secrets can become the most exquisite revelations of all.
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