Every day, moms have a lot on their plates.
Managing multiple responsibilities throughout the day, like cleaning their children’s sticky hands and faces, folding laundry, ensuring they eat breakfast and lunch, and getting them ready for school, leaves parents with a lot on their plates and little time for relaxation.
No matter how hard they try, there will always be some sort of mishap—such as a toy you trip over, a glass of milk that gets knocked over, or a stain somewhere—waiting around the corner.
The luxury of taking a quick shower before going to bed or spending some alone time is something that many mothers cannot afford.
A mother who has seen it all, Heather Duckworth, recently wrote a piece in which she touched on some of the things we take for granted as parents.
A crucial component of that process is the mess that children make as they transform before our own eyes into the people we’ve always thought they’ll become.
It’s crucial to keep in mind that our kids will use the messes we cleaned up when they were adults as the greatest evidence to the upbringing we provided for them, so it’s worthwhile to make an effort to find happiness even in the middle of turmoil.
Unfortunately, not every woman gets to witness the chaos and disarray that kids bring about.
Not all parents are able to experience the happiness that children bring into their life, either.
Many new and expecting mothers connected with Heather’s widely shared post , “The Blue Stain.”
As Heather washed the grout her daughter had created with the slime, her heart began to race as she recalled the catastrophe she had to clean up all those years prior.
This mother would think, “My hands were full, but so was my heart,” after a demanding day of chasing after her two-year-old triplets and her four-year-old elder brother, picking up toys, and making sure no one got hurt in the mountains of laundry she was unable to finish that day.
Heather and her two sons danced to the radio as they cleaned up the playroom before calling it a night.
It was the last time they would laugh so hard for a while, no one could have anticipated.
She was about to go to sleep herself when she heard one of the boys say, “Uh, Oh,” and she noticed the enormous blue stain that would follow her about for the rest of her life.
One of the triplets’ pens exploded in his hand, splattering ink all over the place. Blue pajamas, hands, and face gave the appearance that the little child was a smurf.
Heather became enraged and felt like a lousy mother as she watched.
Although she hadn’t been upset with her son, she did blame herself since she’d placed the pen in a place where kids could readily get to it. She gave in to her emotions.
“When I noticed blue splatters all over the floor and a large pool of ink seeping into our brand-new carpet, I panicked. My husband had been doing the dishes, so I hurriedly shouted for him to come help me. My spouse began cleaning those vivid blue stains off of our carpet as soon as I got my son and took him to the toilet to clean him up. I was immediately upset.
Heather would often get angry and frustrated when she spotted the stain on the brand-new carpet. Up until the day it was eventually removed, the stain represented all the amazing experiences she shared with her sons.
A month after the little child spilled blue paint on the carpet, he was given a cancer diagnosis. Two years later, he passed away, leaving the stain as a reminder of their time together.
It remained in place, but now it served as a continual reminder of my kid. It served as a continual reminder of my annoyance at something so little and insignificant in the grand scheme of things.
The blue stain served as a continual reminder that although life is messy, it is still worthwhile. a persistent prompt to stop worrying about the little things. a continual reminder that people matter more than “things.” a continuous reminder that mishaps do occur. a continual reminder to hold fast to what is important and let go of the trivial things.
She attempted to hide the bright blue stain with the furniture, but each time she tidied the space, it was there, glaring back at her, a constant reminder of her loss and the grief she was still experiencing.
The purpose of Heather’s narrative is to serve as a reminder of how frequently we forget to see the small things in life that bring us purpose and take life for granted. She feels compelled to tell all the mothers out there that the toys scattered around and the filthy clothes are what actually provide their homes a feeling of security and comfort for their family.
As Heather puts it, those messes caused by the people we care about the most are what give our lives meaning because the day will come when we will truly miss those times.”If it meant I could spend one more day with my son, I would gladly have a million blue ink stains on my carpet.”
She gives mothers this advice: try not to become so engrossed in the world that you lose out on spending valuable time with your children. Prioritize what really important in life since it’s too short to waste time cleaning stains!
The day after my fiancé disappeared from our wedding, I spotted him signing documents in my father’s office
I knew how much my fiancé loved me until he didn’t show up at the altar on our wedding day. A day later, I saw him signing papers in my father’s office without me knowing what it was about.
Brian and I visited our favorite fine-dining restaurant on the night of our sixth anniversary as a couple. He seemed very nervous, and I kept wondering why. “What’s wrong, Brian? Are you alright?” I asked him as he shifted in his seat a couple of times while looking behind me.
He nodded and tried his best to smile. “Yeah, of course, I’m okay,” he assured me. “It’s our anniversary and I couldn’t be happier.”
I smiled at his answer and proceeded to look at the menu. I had memorized the menu from all the times we’d been at the restaurant, but I still looked look over it for old time’s sake. By the time I looked up from the menu, I got the surprise of my life.
Brian was on one knee, and there was a group of musicians behind him, playing soft, romantic music with their violins. “Jane, honey. We’ve been together for six years now, and I’m more than certain that I want to spend the rest of my life with you,” Brian declared. “Would you do me the honor of being my wife?” he asked.
I gasped and covered my mouth with my hands. “Of course, yes!” I said, jumping from my seat to give Brian a hug. I looked at the beautiful solitaire ring that Brian slipped on my finger and realized how long it would have taken him to save up for something so big and beautiful.
The following day, I went to visit my parents to let them know that Brian had proposed. My mom was delighted for me and gave me a big hug. However, my dad’s reaction was another story.
“You can’t possibly be happy marrying that man, Jane,” he told me. “What will become of you and your children? Will he even afford to buy you a house? To put your kids through private school?” he started to ask.
“Dad, how could you say that? Brian works hard, and I’m working too. We’ll figure it out together as every married couple does!” I shot back.
“How long did it take him to save up for that ring, anyway? As if that’s supposed to convince me that he can take care of you. If I were you, I’d give that ring back and call the wedding off. It’s not too late, Jane. There are many wealthy bachelors I can introduce you to – men that I can actually entrust my daughter and the future of my business with,” he told me.
I scoffed in disbelief, knowing all my dad ever cared about was money. I shook my head and left the house before I could say anything I’d regret.
Brian and I planned our wedding alone, with subtle help from my mom. Three months of preparation passed, and it was finally time for the big day.
Before the ceremony, Brian couldn’t find his sister and his niece. “Where are they?” he asked his mother. Reluctantly, Brian’s mom revealed that his niece Maxine had to be taken to the hospital for an emergency operation on her heart problem.
“Your sister’s been trying to find people she can borrow money from,” his mom told him. “The hospital won’t start on the operation unless they give a downpayment, but Maxine just doesn’t have that much time left. They need to start the operation as soon as they can.”
Without a second thought, Brian decided to approach my dad to ask for help. “Sir, I know this is going to sound bad, but I was wondering if you could lend me money for my niece’s operation. I had just spent most of what’s in my account on the wedding,” Brian admitted.
I decided to have a cup of coffee at a nearby coffee shop when I suddenly saw Brian looking around the area before entering my dad’s office building.
“I promise, I will pay you back in a month. I just need to get through the month before I get my paycheck,” he asked.
My father shook his head. “I knew you were up to no good,” he scoffed. “But yes, I will help you, on one condition,” he told Brian.
“What is it, sir? I’ll do anything,” Brian said without hesitation.
“You don’t need to pay me back for the money, but you need to disappear from Jane’s life. Run away, and never come back,” he declared.
Brian’s heart twitched upon hearing about my father’s condition. However, he remembered what his mom said about Maxine not having much time left, so he reluctantly agreed. It was his only chance to save his niece’s life.
A couple of minutes later, I was at the altar, weeping. Brian didn’t show up to the wedding, and everyone was trying to console me. “What happened? We were okay yesterday,” I cried. “Where did he go?” I kept asking, after hearing from guests that Brian was at the church earlier that morning.
The following day, my dad asked to meet me at his office. I was supposed to meet him in an hour and a half, but I arrived early.
I decided to have a cup of coffee at a nearby coffee shop when I suddenly saw Brian looking around the area before entering my dad’s office building. “What is he doing here?” I asked myself before deciding to follow him.
By the time I got the bill at the coffee shop, Brian had already entered the elevator. I had a feeling that he was on the way to my dad’s office, so I hurried up the next elevator to see what it was all about.
When I arrived, I saw Brian, my dad, and my dad’s lawyer in the same room. Because the glass windows were soundproof, I could not hear what they were talking about. Instead, I watched my dad’s lawyer hand Brian some papers, which he signed before shaking hands with the other men in the room.
I couldn’t stop myself from barging in at that point. “What is this?! What are those papers and why are you here?!” I yelled.
My dad had a smug look on his face as if telling me he knew this would happen all along. “Your groom here just agreed not to see you ever again in exchange for money,” he told me.
I looked at Brian with the most painful look of betrayal. “Is that true?” I said, trying not to choke from the tightening in my throat that came after hearing what my dad had said.
“I’m sorry, Jane. It’s Maxine. She’s dying, and she needs an expensive operation to save her life,” Brian cried. “Yesterday, I asked your dad for help, and he said he’d help me if I didn’t attend the wedding. I’m sorry, Jane. I can’t bear losing my niece,” he sobbed.
“He just signed the agreement that he would never show up in your life ever again. If you hadn’t shown up, the papers stated that he would not be allowed to tell you the truth, either. But now that you’re here, I guess it’s better for you to know that he replaced your relationship for money,” my dad said, slamming the papers on the table.
“How could you do this to me?!” I yelled at my dad. “My life is not some toy you can just play with! You ruined my relationship, and you ruined what was supposed to be the best day of my life!” I cried.
“What kind of father are you?! I never want to see you again,” I said before leaving his office.
I could feel my knees grow weak, and before I could even reach the elevator, I collapsed on the floor, crying. “Why?” I cried to nobody in particular. It was then that I felt Brian’s arms wrap around me.
“I’m sorry, Jane,” he cried. “I love you with all my heart, but I also couldn’t allow Maxine to die. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.”
“You are the kindest, most selfless man I know,” I told Brian. “I know you only meant well. But I hope you had told me instead of going to my dad. That way, we still could have continued our wedding, and we could have helped Maxine together.”
Brian nodded and sighed upon realizing his mistake. “I didn’t know what to do. You weren’t at the church yet, and your dad was the first one I saw when I heard the news. I’m sorry, Jane,” he apologized to me.
“I understand if you never want to see me again, but I wish you could give me a chance to prove to you how much I love you. I really do, Jane,” he tried to assure me.
“I know you do, Brian, and I love you just as much,” I replied.
That day, we decided to talk about our lives and what we could do moving forward. We visited Maxine at the hospital and paid for the surgery after getting refunds from our wedding suppliers. Maxine successfully underwent surgery, and she once again became the lively, loving girl we all once knew.
Three months passed, and Brian and I decided to start a new life together. We moved to a different city to start fresh, and I decided to cut my dad out of my life for good.
“I hope you understand why I had to do this, mom,” I said when I told my mom my decision of keeping away from dad. “It’s for my own good. He was too toxic for me, and I just couldn’t take it.”
It pained my mom to hear this, but she completely understood where I was coming from. “I will always be here for you, dear,” she assured me. “Please visit me, and always keep in touch. I can’t bear not seeing you for a long time.”
With my mom’s blessing, Brian and I got married in a simple celebration. Only my mom, his parents, a few of our close friends, and his sister and niece were in attendance.
Before leaving town, Brian and I mailed the check my dad had issued back to him. Since then, I never heard from him again. After quitting my job at the family company, he blocked my credit cards and any chance of receiving an inheritance.
With the money I had saved up for years and with Brian’s, too, we were able to buy a small house in the suburbs. I got a job at another company, and together, we worked hard to raise our three children in a loving environment.
What can we learn from this story?
Never let money get in the way of your relationship. Jane’s dad thought getting Brian away from her would be as simple as giving her money. However, when Jane found out the truth about what her dad did, she was angrier with him than with Brian, as she knew Brian was in a difficult situation that left him with no choice but to agree to her dad’s wishes.
Always be honest with your spouse and work through life’s challenges together. When Jane found out the truth, all she wanted was for Brian to have told her the truth, to begin with. That way, they could have avoided what happened at the wedding and continued on. Ultimately, they were able to work through their issues and work together to save Maxine and start a new life together without her dad in the picture.
Share this story with your friends. It might brighten their day and inspire them.
Leave a Reply